she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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