this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
