im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
