I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
