So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
