So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize