the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Drake has all the answers
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
