whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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