Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
