the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
