"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
