I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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