I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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