just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
