What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
