i don't want you to think of me as your TA
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
