the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
