What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
