i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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