Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
