It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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