Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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