I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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