Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
