I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I need moral support for this bender
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Randomize
