If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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