How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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