Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
