i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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