Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Just high enough for therapy.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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