blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
