she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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