So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
