Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize