did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
