and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
