508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Randomize
