Church boner. Awkwardddd
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
