If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
