Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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