Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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