i don't like sucking hair
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
