My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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