Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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