Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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