so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
