What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
