Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize
