Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He did a backflip because drugs
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
