i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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